How is it Friday again?

I'm obviously not in the routine of blogging daily! We've had a frantic week, and I vow to improve next week. Not that anyone is noticing either way!

How stalking a stranger completed my living room

My living room has had a very bare spot for quite a while. Not finding the right, perfect, ideal piece has made the room look unfinished (which is sorta is), a bad look since it's the first place your eye goes when walking in the front door.

I've found the most fabulous custom painting and an artist ready to paint for me, but I can't seem to locate a spare $500. Dang.

We had a mirror over the couch for several years, but it reflected car lights at night & just wasn't working.

Last week I slipped out WITHOUT CHILDREN for a few hours and felt Lucky. I had a little cash money to spend and I was looking for a bargain, so I headed to HomeGoods.

There is was! The right, perfect, ideal temporary piece!

On top of someone else's cart. Dang.

So I stalked her, at a safe distance, through the whole store, willing her to change her mind as I slowly tracked her. She turned a corner. I turned the NEXT corner (see how crafty I am??) and circled back.

What??? She put the canvas down, back in its original spot and picked up another. She placed the NEW one in her cart and moved away from MINE. Cautious and not wanting to spook her I approached. She looked up. I smiled, winningly, and said, "I think I might take this if you don't want it." (See how cool I am??) She said no, she was going to take the new one. I gushed over her new one, as I slowly and carefully loaded my canvas and backed out of the aisle.

Sweet victory is mine!

I high-tailed it to the register, checked out & bolted from the store. Bwwaaahaaaahaaa!

It's just what I wanted as a fabulous placeholder in my living room. What do you think?

Indentured servants #1

I like the idea of having a housekeeper, someone who comes in to my home and cleans it for me while I'm having a fabulous lunch with The Girls after a relaxing mani/pedi.

Except I don't mani/pedi very often.

I have some Girls, but we don't Lunch.

I don't trust anyone to be unattended in my home.

What if they look in my underwear drawer and find the special Tooth Fairy glitter bag and steal all my babies' baby teeth? What if they reorganize my kitchen and I can't find my very best silicone whisk from Ikea? What if they use the wrong cleaner on everything and eat the finish off my beloved granite counter tops? What if they break one of the enormous posters off my four poster bed?

That's the one that did it for me.

Seriously.

That's the real one. And, no apology. No, "By the way I broke your BED"! Nope. Just walked into the bedroom after she was gone & there it was, on the floor.

It was just a little help after baby & c-section #4, until I could, you know, stand up straight and all. Much less nurse a baby every 4.5 minutes. Anyway, that was the last time I have had anyone clean my house. Anyone PROFESSIONAL, that is...

I have servants. Four of them. Granted, they don't do a fabulous job, but they do work pretty cheaply. I feed them. I take them to school and soccer and baseball and gymnastics and sleepovers and birthday parties. I buy them clothes. I let them watch my tv. I don't think it's unreasonable for them to offer some sort of remuneration.

Here are two in action:

They are cleaning windows. Just the parts they can reach. Those, coincidentally, are the parts with the fingerprints and nose prints and forehead prints. Look at those happy faces. They are so happy to have a spray bottle and an old cloth diaper as a rag.

They wanted to work some more, so on to baseboards!

Oh, wait, they're calling me... Yes, Darlings, you may clean the kitchen table and chairs. Just make sure those baseboards are really clean first. I'm going to go work on my bunion callus.

A roaring start!

Ok, I'm not off to a fantastic start, but I have many posts in my head! I'm going to translate one of those to a real post in the next day or two, but this will suffice for now.

List of topics to come:
The doorway spider
Courtney Love
How I got a boyfriend and saved my marriage
The new art in my living room

Quite enticing, no?

Big Disappointment #1

So, back in June, my husband and I took a five day child-free trip to Key West. FIVE DAYS. Divine! We've had a few weekends here & there, but this was the first real trip we've had since we've had kiddos.

In addition to being excited about the R&R, the sleeeeeping without listening, and the wine, I was looking forward to reading a book.

I love, love to read and used to read a lot. Once upon a time I even started a neighborhood book club. It continues, but without me.

I just don't have/make the time to read books for pleasure these days. I'm close, but right now I'm only back up to magazines.

But, I digress. I took a book on our trip, planning to read it on the plane and as I lounged around beach side, pool side, balcony-side, etc.

I settled in, took a deep breath, and opened the pages to find...

I had already read it.

Bummer.

So, here we go...

Last night I decided to start blogging. I really need to clean out the garage. Really. My husband can park in there, but my side is, um, not available at this time. I have clothes to fold and clothes to wash. We are almost out of milk. My toenail polish is chipped. But, I am now a BLOGGER! Ta-da!